Chronicles of Life … on the clock

Why do people keep ruining my worship experience? I try to get my praise and worship on, but the devil is ever busy. Usually it’s some loud child making animal noises or an ignorant suitor using church as the hookup spot that annoys me during the service. But things went to a new level Sunday.

I’m not really a big fan of the whole greet your neighbor segment at church. It’s all well and good, but I have my qualms. Some people just don’t wash their hands. I don’t like touching any and everybody. I get sick enough as it is without catching their germs. I’ll semi participate which means I say howdy to two people and sit down (unless someone comes over). I’m not an official member of any church in Lake City, so I try to stay low key during that portion of the service. I hate being recognized during the fellowship because of my profession. People tend to ask am I writing an article on the service. NO! Can’t I at least be “off duty” for the Lord?
At the service I attended Sunday two women recognized me and mentioned they were going to contact me later. I thought later meant like during normal business hours. One of them just couldn’t wait that long. There I was trying to clap and sing along with the choir (OK I was sitting still as a rock but I do hum in my head) when she passed an announcement from pew to pew to me. Really! She couldn’t at least wait until the offering? In her rush to get it to me she left off vital bits of information. We had to go back and forth correcting it. That ended my sing-along time with the choir.
No place is safe for me anymore. I keep a notepad on hand at all times because I never know who’s going to stop me next. It doesn’t matter if I’m on the phone, in the bathroom or sitting in my car. They absolutely have to share their news right then and there. I go to Walmart late at night because that’s when I’m least likely to be bothered. If someone sees me they will stop to give me information. That’s probably half the reason I’m not a member of a particular church here. People get pushy with their news. I don’t want to have to set some deacon straight if he was trying to discuss work-related issues while passing the communion wine.
It is technically the nature of my line of work to never really be “off duty.” I should be use to it by now. Most times I am, except for when I’m tuned into the service. I’m just glad it wasn’t during the sermon. I think I might start going to church incognito. I’ll create an alias, and no one will know it’s me. Unless there is something Earth shattering that needs coverage right then and there, people can wait to share their news during normal business hours. If nothing else, wait until after church. I’ll get back on the clock then.